What if monsters really existed? What if the monsters weren't green, blue or yellow or tall or short? What if they were invisible, but terribly destructive? There are emotional monsters, monsters that come disguised as anger, jealousy, or selfishness, that can destroy children without their realizing it, that subtly frighten them, that prevent them from maturing and learning.
Here you have one list with the 9 emotional monsters that can prevent children from developing fully and happily. Learn to recognize them to help your child overcome them.
We tend to think of monsters as non-existent beings, the fruit of our children's fantasy and imagination. However, monsters do exist. Only they are not called Tetradocus or Persiometrides ... They are not elongated, slimy or ghostly. They arrive without us perceiving them and take over the emotions. They are the emotional monsters. Those emotions that produce terribly destructive feelings in the child. Here is a list of the most important ones:
The most fearsome monster of all is called anger. It is violent, irrational. Capable of overriding the senses. When a child is angry and cannot control it, they erupt into tantrums, throw objects, or even hit other children. Anger is a basic and necessary emotion, because it serves as a 'flight', an 'escape' from tension or stress, from frustration ... But we must teach our child to handle it. Feeling anger, yes. Letting it out in the form of aggressiveness, no.
There are many methods and games to teach children to manage anger. of all, slow breathing is very useful.
Jealousy is also part of irrational feelings. They usually arrive when the child thinks that the people they love the most devote more time and attention to another child, another adult ... In the end, their way of expressing jealousy is very varied: from a child who begins to disobey without reason, that He is rebellious and angry, even a child who begins to withdraw into himself.
Although you may think at first that it is the same as jealousy, it is not. In fact, envy is very different from jealousy. While the jealous man is actually afraid of losing something he wants, the envious man seeks to harm the other or deprive him of some privilege even though he also loses, because he does not want the other to be more than him (happier, more sympathetic, more ..).
Envy is very destructive because it prevents a person from growing, traps them in a spiral of dissatisfaction that undermines their self-esteem. It is a feeling that poisons. An envious child does not seek to shine on his own, but rather seeks to steal the light from another. Deep down, it will never be realized.
Pride is similar to arrogance and the great enemy of learning. The child believes that he knows everything, that he is more than the others. And he prefers to turn a deaf ear to the advice of a mother, a teacher, his grandparents or another child. The favorite phrase of this emotional monster is: 'And what are you going to give me that I don't know?' Pride is the main obstacle to learning, a monster that implies a very strong feeling to dominate the other.
Deep down, it's nothing more than a lack of self-esteem. He is a monster with such low self-esteem, that he needs constant approval, constantly feeling above others to shine. They are children who are constantly demanding praise, who love to talk about themselves and what they are capable of doing. And of course, criticism is not well received. Fight the monster of pride through self-esteem.
What your child really needs is to trust himself more and learn to value the abilities of others. In this case, enhancing empathy and tolerance will come in handy.
Pride is not the same as pride, even if they look alike. It's okay for your child to take pride in what he does and toward certain skills and attitudes. But if he is too proud, this will make him lose his real vision and will be a hindrance in his learning. The pride monster has a hard time forgiving and accepting its mistakes. Yes, the monster of arrogance is a close friend of yours.
Many times, a child uses his pride as a shield to stop attacks, because he thinks that someone wants to hurt him. And what actually happens to him is that he feels weak inside. That child who if they scold him responds laughing ... or refuses to apologize to a friend he hurt ... actually uses the monster of pride as a defense to feel more important. He is really asking you to improve your confidence and self-esteem.
Yes, selfishness is also a monster. And very harmful. You prevent children from establishing social relationships, you destroy their social skills. But selfishness has a very strong enemy: generosity, an essential value that wreaks havoc on the monster of selfishness.
It is true that children cannot be forced to share. the goal is to show them why they can benefit from sharing. For example, teaching them that if they are generous, they will have a much easier time making friends. Selfishness makes the child think only of him or put his interests before the common good. You must understand that it is a position that ultimately destroys your relationship with others.
Cervantes used to say: "There is no path that does not end if laziness is not opposed to it." Laziness is an attractive but very harmful monster for the child. It prevents you from growing, learning, finishing your projects. prevents you from being successful.
To end laziness, you need a quintal of enthusiasm, projects that excite the child, and a change of attitude, of course, that comes from the hand of effort and perseverance. Strengthen these two values in him and you will end laziness forever.
The hostility monster is grumbling and very sullen. He does not like making friends very much because he has not managed to develop positive thinking and is always thinking that everything will go wrong. It is a pessimistic monster by nature and overly sensitive.
He always thinks that everyone thinks badly or has something against him. That is to say, that deep down, once again, what happens to this monster is that it does not trust itself. Or that at some point someone hurt him and uses hostility as a defense shield, for fear that they will hurt him again. It is a very destructive monster that makes the child suffer a lot.
When the monster of greed appears, the boy suddenly begins to think of him, only him. He wants more and more and is unable to set limits. Destroy generosity and social relationships. To stop this, there is nothing like helping him by teaching him from a young age the benefits and advantages of sharing. Pamper and prioritize your gifts and abilities, those that are not treasured physically. You will get him to defeat the monster of greed when he understands that the one who has the most is not the happiest, but the one who needs the least.
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