Why should we be, whenever possible, happy and content? There is a reason that we sometimes forget and that Anna Morató, mother and author of books like 'When I grow up I want to be happy' or 'Today I'm going to have a good day!' when we are positive and happy we feel good about ourselves.
We adults have already learned the lesson, although it is difficult for us to put it into practice. What to do with the children? The short story writer has a very useful tool: the traffic light technique for children to face the day with positivity.
It is clear that the benefits of being positive are many and that the first beneficiaries, apart from the people around us, are ourselves. There are moments or situations in which it may cost us a little more, but it is really worth making that effort to try to go down the path of positivity and get away, whenever we can, from the continuous complaint that only leads us to negativity.
Anna Morató talks about six values that are necessary to instill being positive in the smallest of the house:
1. Positive language
The way we speak and the words we choose are essential to create a positive attitude in ourselves and in others. And it is that words have the power to do a small or big problem and, sometimes, they can do more damage than a slap.
2. Loving yourself
To achieve this, it is important that parents do everything possible so that the child feels good about himself (telling him what he does well, correcting what he does wrong and making him feel that we love him) and that his self-esteem is always positive. It is also important to explain that no one should make you feel bad and that it is very good to always go to bed with positive thoughts.
And here is a golden rule that children and adults should not skip over and that will help us understand this concept: treat others as we would like to be treated. Shall we start?
4. The gratitude
We have taught our children to thank when someone gives them a gift, but what if we also used to do it when grandma makes them some croquettes or grandpa takes them to their after-school shift by car because it rains? It will be a way for them to learn to value things. There are people who have a lot and are not happy, and then there are people who have little and are happy. In the end, it is valuing what we have.
We have to equip our children with enough tools so that they are able to face the difficulties that they will encounter in life. What if we put small daily challenges that will be able to test them and that will make them grow?
6. Manage frustration
When things are not the way we want, what can we do? We can't really change the situation, but we can decide how to react to this situation.
Children always complain that they cannot choose, that they have no power, that the elders always rule. But, there are precisely things that they can choose: the words that come out of their mouth, enjoy or be grateful depends on themselves. Language and positive attitude are like a traffic light. Do you know what we mean?
- Green light
When the traffic light is green, we move forward. We can go forward. That does not mean that there are no problems, that we do not find difficulties or stones along the way, but with the green light we move forward.
- Red light
When we start to say negative words or we stay in the phase of 'this is a roll, this is unfair, this is not valid', the traffic light changes from green to red. There is a natural part, which comes out at first to say it, but once we have already expressed them several times (one, two or even three times) we must get out of there. Once I've gotten it off my chest, try to select other words: 'I'm going to find another solution', 'I need your help' or 'Please, let's try another way'.
Happiness is not the absence of problems or things that we do not like. It is very easy to be happy when everything is going well, but the grace or the kit of the question is to say in those moments that things are not going so well or are not as I want, how do I navigate? It does not have to be with a smile from ear to ear, but to approach it in a positive way and, of course, not to fall into that victimhood of 'it is unfair, it only happens to me ...'.
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